The heart question(Love??)

What is love?
An intriguing concept
But one I am not sure
Makes much sense to me
The sky lights up all around me
The warmth in my heart
Is that it?
The emptiness I feel when she leaves
Is that what it means?
Or is it the kind of detachment I feel
When I think of all the females around me?
Maybe it is love
But love for me
Maybe I am in love with me

Or perhaps I need to make peace
With the turbulence inside me
Before I can make sense
Of the riddle called true love
What is love?
A setback
A force of negativity
A school of thought
A portal to the land of the lost
A cause
A lost one
What is it?
A feeling of intensity
An unseen entity
A careening trailer
Going out of control
A wave of destruction
A story with no good ending
I have no idea and neither does the world
There are times I believe we are all lost

Here i go again

Here I go again
On a swirling merry go round
Same shit different day
Crowned
Left all the others
Staying alone
In a void going round and round

Here I go again
Hating my own kind
Here I go again
Wondering why
Here I go again
Running out of time
Here I go again
Missing you
And smiling cos you think its you
But its not
But it’s him (M.O.N.E.Y)
Here I go again
Wondering what is true
What is false?
What is start?
Where is finish?


Here I go again
Knowing you
Cannot make me stay
Here I go again
Knowing flight is the only way
Here I go again
Tired and unsure whether
I can keep fighting again
Here I go again
Not eating, not sleeping…..
Just being
Here I go again

Rain

I see the storm clouds gather on the horizon
I taste the rain on the breeze
Swirling around me
I feel great rivers of peace
Surging on my insides
And the pain around becomes nothing
But lies
As I look into the heavens
And deep blue skies

I do not think about the lies
I do not think about the many disappointments
From the loves of my past life
I do not think about the emptiness around me
Which kills trust in people like me
All I think about
Are the cloud covered skies
And the clarity that will come
When the rain is done

I do not think of war
Neither do I allow thoughts of loss
I do not dwell on the long road
Each step brings me closer to my goal
And that singular thing will atone
For everyday spent disappointed
And every moment I had to remove
Myself from horrible people
And to make a life on my own
I do regret not seeing this earlier
I regret turning deaf ears
To what was right in front of me
I thank God for this
Even as I wait patiently for the rain to pour on me

A word

A word for everyday
A word of thanksgiving
Word of free willing
To tell you father in heaven
How much you mean to me
Truly you are my king
The one who knew me
Even before I began to breathe
The one who makes me live

A word for every breath I take
A word for everyday that breaks
A word for every step I take
A word for the smile on my face
A word of thanksgiving that crushes delay
A word that stays my soul from the beneath
A word that makes me
Find my way out from the darkness that surrounds me
I’d like you who reads this
To say a word this minute
Not a word of complaint
Not a word of regret
Don’t let it be a word of hate
And don’t let the word be late
Say a word that tells him he is great
A word that exalts his name
So that he will remove your pain
So that he will set you free
Don’t be like me
Who sometimes forgets to count his blessings
Be a man
Be a person
That in spite of what you endure
What is not yours
What you want and are not getting
Just say a word
And let this word
Be thanks
Because our Lord is kind

Selah