The moment

You know the moment when you think so much that your brain is on the verge of an explosion?
You know the moment when you cease to care about anyone or anything?
You know the moment you realize that you do not have a life? That all you are living for is what you are chasing.
You know the moment that you pray and you pray till your voice becomes hoarse
and all you hear is an eerie silence and it seems as if God is not hearing
Or like a voice would whisper in your subconscious
That does he even exist?
And even if he does why the heck should he care about someone like you?
Or the scariest of moments when you are on your own
The world has turned its back on you
Telling you that everything about you is meaningless
You won't amount to anything
And for that scary second that that voice speaks and whispers into your subconscious
You believe it
And you wish you could just die
Lie back and close your eyes and stop fighting
stop swimming against the current

well everyone of those situations i described above
I felt them last night
Opening my eyes this morning was a strain
cos i was like what the heck do i have to gain?
Men!!!
I was sad! and completely out of it.
But when i walked out of the house
and saw the rising sun
It became clear to me
As long as I am alive
I can achieve and be whatever it is I want to be
As long as i keep believing.
That God has not abandoned me
Each step is harder than i thought it would ever be
But i have come to far to give up now
I must press on
Where the strength is gonna come from
I do not know
All i know i have to be on the go
I must prevail
And if anything i have said thus far makes any sense
And you can relate to it then you must to
Depression and the devil mustn't laugh
or rejoice over you